I have....

The baby bug.

goodnight- :)

Two....

I can't believe that as I write this post my sweet little bear is running circles around the house with piggies in her hair, talking up a storm! I wonder where she gets all those words, and why she is the conversationist that she is? :) haha...for those of you who know me even a little bit, I think you can answer this question. From Jake! hehehehe, okay, really, she gets it from her mama!

Truly though, Addison is just one short month shy of two years old already. Anyone who is a parent knows how quickly the early years of our babies lives go by. I vividly remember my mom telling me as I complained of wanting school years to fly by or weeks to turn into weekends-- the words "don't wish your time away, it goes by too quickly!" I understand this in a way only a parent could now.

The first year of Addison's life went by fast, but being a new parent, certain "periods" of time were easy to transition out of....(um, I'm speaking of the night feeding months- for those of you in the dark :) and every week, really, brought new exciting milestones and the opportunity to trust my own instincts when it came to taking care of my baby. So although the year flew by and it was sad to see my infant turn into a baby, then a pre-toddler....it was a full year of many new, welcomed surprises!

This last year- oh my heart! Addison is a little girl, she knows so much already and I feel like I can watch this little one mature by the day and become more aware of the world around her and more excited to learn, grow and discover! This too, is a very exciting time in all of our lives....but where did this year go? Where are the chubby wrists and rolly-polly thighs I squeezed and kissed everyday? Did they disappear without my knowledge? How does that little brain form not only cohesive words- but sentences that make sense and often leave me in wonderment of how she even knows what she's asking or telling me?

My little baby is now a little girl who sings "Jesus loves me, Are you sleeping, and The Itsy Bitsy Spider," Followed by high pitched squeels and laughter rooted in the pure joy only a child can enjoy fully!

So I guess what I'm saying is, that in the last two years of life, the two years my little bear has been a part of our lives, EVERYTHING has changed- for me as an individual and a woman.

I feel like I know more of who I am and who I was made to be. I understand the reality of what it means to be more selfless, what it means to be a missionary in my own home, someone who loves unconditionally and with wreckless abandon- a small glimpse of how our Father loves us.

The things that once seemed so important in "my" life, the things that would fulfill "me" just don't have the meaning or intensity that they once did- and in surrendering my wants and dreams, God has only given me greater ones!

When I hear Addison Marie say "mommy, I wuv you!" "Is it tasty mama?" "Kiss mama" my heart could not be any more full...this child I have been given could not be more of a gift that literally keeps on giving. So as we enter into the next year of "toddler-hood" and our family continues to grow, dreams, hopes and aspirations are changed and continually molded by the potter... I look forward to the moments of joy, the lessons from hurt and the unmeasurable blessings that come from Jesus and cling to each moment.

Be Blessed!
K